last goodbye

Boy, if only real-life change were as easy to observe and document as this: as easy to attempt as the change of blog a address, as easy to follow as a click on a link, as easy to believe as an updated profile.

Well, I still suffer from vertigo, and yes, this is still my way of coping. I'm just doing it in a different place now, and with different people. Although everything written here is true (or at the very least was true when it was writtten), I am not exactly the same person anymore. And this is no longer home.

But should you want to continue with me, I cannot help but invite: Come.

*****

I leave with two songs in my head:


Grace
Jeff Buckley

There’s the moon asking to stay
Long enough for the clouds to fly me away
Well it’s my time coming, I’m not afraid, afraid to die

My fading voice sings of love
But she cries to the clicking of time,
Wait in the fire...

And she weeps on my arm
Walking to the bright lights in sorrow
Oh drink a bit of wine we both might go tomorrow
Oh my love...

And the rain is falling and I believe my time has come
And it reminds me of the pain I might leave behind
Wait in the fire...

And I feel them drown my name
So easy to know and forget with this kiss
But I’m not afraid to go, baby it’s all because of you
But I’m not afraid to go, but it goes so slow, slow
Wait in the fire, wait in the fire
Wait in the fire...

...don’t you take it away from me



Anticipation
Carly Simon

We can never know about the days to come
But we think about them anyway
And I wonder if I'm really with you now
Or just chasing after some finer day

Anticipation, Anticipation
Is making me late
Is keeping me waiting

And I tell you how easy it is to be with you
And how right your arms feel around me.
But I rehearsed those words just late last night
When I was thinking about how right tonight might be

Anticipation, Anticipation
Is making me late
Is keeping me waiting

And tomorrow we might not be together
I'm no prophet and I don't know nature's way
But I'll try to see into your eyes right now
And stay right here
'Cause these are the good old days

*****

Enough said.